Office lover

So this season is the last season for  "the office" one of my fav shows ever. I can watch this on netflix all day long over and over and not get bored, love them. I missed Michael when he left but the show was still good after he left, I guess some things have to come to an end sooner or later. I'm going to miss Jim and Pam and Jim lol ( his character is just so cute),

 I mean their wedding episode was one of the best, right next to the fire drill one.

 I secretly wish that they were together in real life, I just love a good romance.

 Am I the only one who is feeling a little sad over this show coming to an end? I mean it's just a show.

can you say overwhelmed?

I've been doing a bit too much research for my son(Eli) lately and I got to say that I am feeling overwhelmed with all this information that I am finding. I feel like I have tons of work ahead of me and I feel like I won't make it through it sometimes, I'm just one person after all.
I have no idea how my son's autism is going to affect him in the future, he is only 4 and right now he is the happiest kid, he loves to play and laugh and spend time with family, he is such an awesome kid. I have noticed lately that not been able to communicate with words is getting him frustrated. Sometimes when we can't understand each other, he runs to his room and closes the door and won't let me in.

I know that I can only get the kind of strength that I need from God, I know that I got to ask and pray for it, I know that I can do all things through Christ, that he is with me and I just need to rest in his love and know that everything will be fine. I know all of this...I know I need to pray.... so if I know all of this then why am I not praying enough???
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm..........

I got some praying to do.



Anyway, this past weekend we took all of the cousins to the zoo (from my husbands side). It was fun, Eli had a great time with his cousin. I gotta say though, I was so tired afterwards. We took 19 kids and we were 9 adults, it was like a school field trip.

     This is some of us, we didn't all fit in the same picture.

homemade curtains.

I was having a hard time finding curtains to fit my sons' window.. it's a very long window. The ones that I found in the store were too expensive and I'm on a budget so I decided to make them myself. I needed them to be short because they had long ones before and they kept hanging from them and bending the pole so every night I had to fix them.

This is how they turned out...

 I'm not crazy about them but they do the job and they are kind of cute. The stitch witchery worked great.

I often use the " I'm sorry my house is a mess, I have 3 toddlers" excuse, but the sad part is that it is not an excuse, it's the pure truth.

 If I don't clean my house for 1 day, just one 1 day, it takes me about 5 hours to get it decent looking the next day and who wants to spend 5 hours cleaning? not me. If I want it to be spotless, it takes me about 2 days, but honestly I can never really accomplish that, unless my mom or mother in law are coming, then I have no choice but to stay up till 1am doing it. If my kids are spending the night at my mom's then I could, but I choose not to, those are my lazy days and they only happen about once every 2 or 3 months so I take advantage.


                                                              I wish this was me.

                                                              but instead this is me.

 OK that's not really me, I found this pictures online. (but you get the picture)

I've been crying alot lately.

My kids are at my mom's today because I meet with my 4 year old's teacher today.  I wanted to ask her how I could be more involved in helping my son succeed and of course I ended up in tears. Poor teacher.

I have been doing alot of research with the help of  family, My 4 and 3 year old don't speak. My oldest has been going to an early intervention program for a little over a year and they diagnosed him with autism, I worry that my 3 year old could be the same. I didn't really know what autism was until I started to notice that there was something special about my child and that I needed to look into it more. I, of course freaked inside and got into protective mommy mode and try to do as much research as possible.

His teacher was  wonderful, she listened to me and let me open up to her (which I really needed) she made me feel so much better with her words and didn't look confused when I couldn't hold back the tears anymore. I know that even though we know that we are doing a good job, we sometimes need the validation and for someone to let us know that it's gonna be ok. It felt good to let it out since I always put out a strong face for my husband and my mom, I act like I am doing a great job at keeping it together, I do all my crying in the car in between trips to my mom's house and back (she lives 30 mnts away) I don't like to show them how vulnerable I sometimes am, I just don't like them to see me that way.

 I trust in the Lord and I know that He is there for me and that if He allowed for this things to happen then it's for a reason and that He will bless us through it all.

I love my babies and I would and will do anything and everything for them. I just pray for strength and patients,

This is us + poop

So I tried to get a picture of my kids and I all together and well it never really works.

But I did finally managed to get an ok one, with some editing of course.

So this is my little family (- the husband works all day and when he comes home he doesn't enjoy me flashing a camera on his face)

The other day I woke up early and jumped in the shower before my kids could wake up, my husband was awake watching tv in the living room so I didn't worry about them getting up and me not being there for them. I had a really nice long shower since my husband was home and I didn't have to rush and take a 5 mnt shower while my kids are busy watching tv and strapped in their high chairs. When I open the bathroom door I immediately smelled poop, it was a very strong smell so I went to the living room to see where it was coming from and I found my husband with the boys laying on the couch watching cartoons. I asked him where Tirzah was and he said she was still sleeping on our bed, I went to go check on her and she was not there so I walk into the boys bedroom and what do I find? My little daughter covered in poop. She had taken off her diaper and pooped in like 4 different spots in the room and then sat on her little upholster Dora chair and left poop all over it, she then stepped on the poop and there were little poop foot prints everywhere, including the hallway. Half of the toys were smeared with poop. It was awesome. :(
 

I dared to grocery shop with my 3 toddlers.

It was fun!
They enjoyed picking out things they wanted to eat. (We avoided the candy isle)

Today my 4 year old was supposed to go back to school, for some reason they changed his schedule and instead of going to school at 10:45am, he now has to be there at 8:30am... why? why?
First of all I can't even think straight that early and my kids are not even really fully awake. I had a plan in my head as to how this morning was gonna go, I was gonna wake up at 7am, I already had his clothes and backpack ready to go and all I had to do was shower him (for some reason I feel the need to send him to school as clean as he can be), dress him, feed him and put him and my other 2 in the car. Of course none of those things happened... well I did feed them.
 I didn't get up till 8am, all 3 of my kids were still sleepy and didn't care to get ready. I only had 20 mnts to do all of the above things and there was no way that I could get it all done so I chose not to even try. I feel terrible about it because I know that it's my responsibility to be up on time, I heard my alarm but ignored it, and before I knew it, it was 8am.
 I feel so irresponsible.
At least is not like it was his first day at kindergarten ...... but still.

side note: If one of my kids hits me with a toy one more time today, I think that I'm gonna lock myself in the bathroom and cry.